but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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