I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I currently don't understand fingers.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
