Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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