Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
