Kiss
Puke
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
