Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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