when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
