he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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