We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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