What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
