Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
