my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
