Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Send help, water and tortillas.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Randomize
