just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
