Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
