I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I'm always down for nudity.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
