Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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