And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
you inspire me to be a worse person
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
