with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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