have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Someone shit on the floor
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
