I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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