honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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