How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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