Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
