Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
