CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
