SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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