she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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