I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
As shirtless as possible
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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