You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
