would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
i dont even know how to be here
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
