Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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