Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize