I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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