I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
