5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
