I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
