Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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