i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
