The maid of honor just puked.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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