Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
