hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
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