if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
