It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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