I CAN MOONWALK!
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
