Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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