im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
