I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
