Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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