didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
