If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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