We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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